Sark Saturday (28 Feb 15) The End of February 2015 Edition

The following is sarcasm, while our intent is not to irritate, aggravate, humiliate, or any other …ate, we can not deny that we don’t have a problem with those things.  So if you are irritated, aggravated, humiliated, or any other …ated, please leave a quick note, that way we can cachinnate.




Dateline:  Washington D.C., USA

Soon to be retiring Attorney General Eric “The Duck” Holder has blamed Fox news for Americans (and I am assuming Britons, Australians, French, Israelis, Syrians, Jordanians, Iraqis, Afghans, Indians, Pakistanis, Canadians, Belgians, Danes, Russians etc) for thinking that terrorism is a threat.  I am not sure if that factored into his flat-out refusal to give an “exit” interview to Fox news or could it possibly be that Ducky played this game…[Link]


Dateline:  Victoria Falls, Zimbabwe

President/King/Self-Proclaimed Semi-Divine Being Bob celebrated his 91st birthday at the colonial-era town near the famed waterfall.  While giving no indications of stepping down anytime soon, Bob and his guests (members of the ruling junta) gorged themselves on the meat of a pair of elephants that oh so willingly gave up their lives to sate Bob’s prodigious hunger.  [Where is PETA when you need them?]  After blaming the UK for all the ills of Zimbabwe’s current condition, he stated that he planned to “liberate” more white “safari owners” land.  Translating Bob-ese into English that means more land stolen from anyone who opposes his autocratic inept rule to be redistributed to his loyalists.  So anyone thinking of taking safari to Zimbabwe…Don’t.  It could be a fatal error.


Dateline:  Cairo, Arab Republic of Egypt

In a shocking turn of events, Judge Mohamed el-Sayed of the Court For Urgent Matters ruled that Hamas (the totally NOT corrupt and incompetent rulers of the Gaza strip) is a terrorist group, citing recent attacks on civilians and security forces in the Sinai and beyond, because they intended to harm the country (Egypt).    Although one wonders if this has anything to do with the rumors floating around that ISIS has established a presence in Gaza and Hamas fighters were flocking to the new wannabes, and that Hamas leadership were in communication and possibly negotiations with ISIS for some sort of partnership.  Egypt has already bombed ISIS targets in Libya after the mass murder of Egyptian Coptic Christian workers there.


Dateline:  London, England, Great Britain

In news that spits in the face of Marie Harf, deputy spokesperson for the US State Department, who stated that we need to give terrorists jobs to prevent terrorism.  Jihad Johnny/Jihad John (aka Mohammed Emwazi) was college educated (with a degree in computer science) and was not in need of job, he is in need of a bullet to the brain, a tomahawk to the torso, or a hellfire to the head.  Marie Harf who is shockingly an intelligence analyst by trade, defended her statement by claiming that her argument was too nuanced for some, or it could possibly be that her argument was just plain IDIOTIC.  Nearly all wars end when one side gets tired of dying, meaning you CAN kill your way out of a war.  Lack of jobs do not create terrorists, power-hungry assholes create terrorists.  Less I remind everyone that Nazi Germany and Imperial Japan had nearly 100% employment, and both continued to fight until we (The US, UK, USSR, and our allies) killed enough of them that they begged for peace.  Gee, you think that would work here?  Absolutely.  Germany and Japan both had a major cultural changes after the war, both of those countries are now some of the most peaceful countries on the planet.  That sounds like a good plan to me.  I would love to see, a Christian church, a Jewish synagogue, a Hindu Temple, a Buddhist Pagoda or Vihara, and a Pagan Sacred Grove in Mecca along with the Mosque there.


Dateline:  New York City, New York, USA

If you were wondering what the United Nations has been up to for the past couple of months while ISIS (Daesh) has been chopping heads off, burning people alive, and generally committing genocide, well so were we hence we looked into it.   The UN Security council has…as of late last evening, strongly condemned the “ongoing barbaric terrorist acts” committed by militants of the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL) aka ISIS or Daesh or a bunch of asshats running around killing, raping, destroying, you know crimes against humanity type things that the UN was allegedly formed to stop, and reaffirmed its determination in defeating the extremist group.  Wow!!  Can you feel the determination?  Rumors abound about ISIS contemplating surrendering to the UN.  Not really.  Good thing we pay millions of dollars for the UN to deplore ISIS’s genocide.  Bravo UN, keep up the great work.  In other news, UN chief Ban Ki-moon visited a dam in Chile.  While I generally don’t criticize the UN, mainly because I don’t pick low hanging fruit, seriously I couldn’t let this one slide by.


on a lighter note:


Dateline:  Outside a Pub, Ireland

An intellectually challenged thief met his match when he tried repeatedly to break the window on a Mercedes, until the brick he threw at the defenseless vehicle bounced off, hit him in the face, and knocked him unconscious.  If I were Mercedes marketing, I would make a commercial out of the video.



Tart Tuesday [New Year Sark] (13 Jan 15)

Welcome to the New Year’s First Sarcastic post, once again the following is sarcasm…enjoy


Dateline:  Paris, France:

In the worst anti-Islamic violence in decades, maybe even centuries, hundreds, nay, thousands of Muslims here in Paris and around Europe were treated to how civilized people’s express their displeasure (Je suis Charlie), nearly 4 million people came out in support of this ‘pogrom’, Heads of States including French President Francois Hollande, Albanian Prime Minister Edi Rama, Belgian PM Charles Michel, Bulgarian PM Boyko Borisov, Croatian PM Zoran Milanovic, Czech PM Bohuslav Sobotka, Danish PM Helle Thorning-Schmidt, Finnish PM Alexender Stubb, Georgian PM Irakli Garibashvili, German Chancellor Angela Merkel, Greek PM Antonis Samaras, Hungarian PM Viktor Orban, Irish Taoiseach Enda Kenny, Italian PM Matteo Renzi, Kosovo President Atifete Jahjaga, Latvian PM Laimdota Straujuma, Luxembourg PM Xavier Bettel, Maltese PM Joseph Muscat, Monaco State Minister Michel Roger, Dutch PM Mark Rutte, Norwegian PM Erna Solberg, Polish PM Ewa Kopacz, Portugese PM Pedro Passos Coelho, Romanian President Klaus Iohannis, Slovakian PM Robert Fico, Slovenian PM Miro Cerar, Spanish PM Mariano Rajoy, Swedish PM Stefan Lofven, Swiss Confederation President Simonetta Sommaruga, Turkish PM Ahmet Davutoglu, Ukrainian PM Petro Poroshenko, British PM David Cameron, Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu, Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas, Jordanian King Abdullah II (and his lovely bride, Queen Rania), Benin President Yayi Boni, Gabon President Ali Bongo Ondimba, Mali President Ibrahim Boubacar Keita, Niger President Mahamadou Issoufou, Tunisian PM Mehdi Jomaa, Togo President Faure Gnassingbe, Serbian PM Ivica Dacic, and Senegalese President Macky Sall, .  The following countries sent their foreign ministers (or equivalent):  Algeria, Armenia, Austria, Egypt, Estonia, Lebanon, Russia, and UAE.  Brazil, China, India, and the US sent their Ambassadors to France.  If you are a representative of a country not on this list you should be ashamed.


Dateline:  Cairo, Egypt:


While we all knew that Egyptian President Abdel Fattah el-Sisi had big brass ones, since he crushed the short-lived Muslim Brotherhood caliphate and the violence it generated, we were unaware that he had traded them in for titanium ones, in a shocking display, he went to the Al Azhar Mosque and University (often called the Vatican of Egyptian Islamic thought) and took them to task the Imams there for not dragging Islam into the modern era.  While there is no doubt that President el Sisi has done some questionable things, it does seem he is looking out for the best interests of Egypt and peace through out the world.  Bravo el-Sisi.


Dateline:  Washington D.C., USA:


There is no truth to the rumor that the President was too busy practicing his putt to attend Sunday’s Republican Anti-terror marches in Paris (or one of the 40 cities around the world, including one in Washington D.C.).

Nor is there any truth to the fact that Vice President Biden was locked in a closet (again).

or that Secretary of State Kerry hasn’t been seen since he started looking for Constantinople, he is getting close, he is at a Dunkin Donuts in Islamabad per twitter @JohnKerry.

Initially the media was told that security was an issue, but the Secret Service issued a statement that they had not been tasked with providing security.  Although we couldn’t swallow that fib either, with 40 plus world leaders attending, that rally or at least parts of that rally was literally the “safest place on the planet” for that time period.  Considering the epic level of unpopularity of the federal government, we are surprised that all 4.3 million of them (as of 2012) didn’t pack up and head over to gay Paris, for a bit of a holiday.  Although…perhaps they were afraid we would slam and lock the door behind them.


Have a great day, be safe, and come back soon.

Kenya’s Security Dilemma (26 Sep 13)

After the recent tragedy at Westgate Shopping Center in Nairobi, Kenya faces some difficult choices to make.  Kenya knows that the Harakat al-Shabaab al-Mujahideen, was behind the heinous crimes, perpetrated in the safety of that suburban mall.

In Kenya, most people relate more closely with their tribal affiliations then with their religious ones (a major source of strife historically within Kenya dating back to before British Colonial times), but with 11.2 % of Kenya’s population being Muslim (that being said, Islam has not been a major force in most of the tribal disputes in Kenyan history) there is a significant possibility of problems with religious disputes.  A much more significant possibility is the risk of having 500,000 Somali refugees within Kenya’s borders, both for the refugees, and the threat that, that many people harbor (perhaps even unknowingly or unwillingly) Al-Shabaab terrorists.  The regional rivalry between Somalia and Kenya dates back to at least the Sifta War (of 1963-67), and has including some severe nastiness, and this figures to continue, with this latest atrocity.

Kenya’s possible reactions to the Westgate Mall tragedy include the following:

1) Make anti-terror statements, but in practice ignore it.  While this is the ‘safest’ choice politically (at least on the global scale) it will be deeply unpopular with the Kenyan people and be viewed by Al-Shabaab terrorists as a great victory, and entice them to conduct more terror attacks inside Kenya.


2)  Ramp up anti-Al-Shabaab activities both in Kenya and support the FGS (Federal Government of Somalia) in Somalia.  This option has little risk to it internationally, will garner support at home in Kenya, and put pressure on Al-Shabaab, although it is also likely to incite more terror attacks in Kenya.


3.)  Gather International Support (possibly even a UN resolution) and preferably a Major Power Endorsement (US, Russia, China, and/or India), and buff up the military, and hit Al-Shabaab real hard (kind of hard to do, with F-5s and Pumas), and while the Kenyan army is well-regarded and brave, their lack of high-tech weaponry and combat-multiplier enhancement tools (to say nothing of the extensive training needed to properly use them) limit their ability to put firepower on targets quickly and effectively (as noticed in the operation to retake Westgate Mall).  [This is the option that I strongly suggest for the Kenyan government to take].


4.) There is one other option, I wasn’t going to include but I have decided to on the grounds that while I vehemently disagree with the mere suggestion of it, I realize that for some it is the only option they are willing to consider.  Kenya has the option to request from Al-Shabaab surrender terms.  While I have no idea what form the leaders of Al-Shabaab/Al-Qaeda would desire, I would assume installation of sharia law, mass conversion to some acceptable (to Al-Shabaab) form of Islam, and of course monetary compensation to Al-Shabaab (almost certainly the most desirable portion of any agreement).  [as I stated this in my opinion would be the least preferable option for the world community as a whole, the people of Kenya, and most especially for the people of Somalia].


While some of the more ignorant politicians insinuate or even flat-out state that the War on Terror is over, make no mistake, nothing could be further from the truth.  The free world, and the not-so-Free world are at war, with the largest threat to humanity ever.  This threat is smart, industrious, and agile, they will continue to change and morph, much like the creature in the science fiction thriller, The Thing, in order to achieve victory, which for them is the establishment of a world-wide caliphate, they will settle for nothing less.  For them it is a case of victory or death.


For More information on Al-Shabaab [Link]


{as a side note, for those supporters of gun control, I refer you to [link], so that you will take notice of the fact that both automatic and semi-automatic weapons are banned from private ownership in Kenya, this did absolutely nothing to stop the terrorists from acquiring the weapons needed to conduct their deadly deeds, although it did allow for them to attack innocent civilians with complete confidence that those civilians were unarmed}



Humpday History (4 Sep 13)




Here is some of the history of the nerve agent known as Sarin.

Sarin gas molecule

Sarin gas molecule

Sarin was developed in Wuppertal (Germany) by IG Farben as an improved pesticide in the late 1930s.

Allegedly, Sarin was named in honor of IG Farben’s scientists who discovered it:  Gerhard Schrader, Otto Ambros, Rudiger, and Van der Linde.  (I’m not sure how Van der Linde fits)

Nazi Germany produced somewhere between 500 kg and 10 tons of Sarin in World War 2.  Although Sarin and other nerve agents were incorporated into artillery shells, none were used against Allied forces.


Starting in the early 1950s both the NATO alliance and the Warsaw Pact started producing sarin to be used against the other in case of war.


In 1956 all sarin production in the US was ceased, although distilling existing stocks continued until 1970.


In March and April of 1988, Sarin was used by Saddam Hussein’s Iraq against both Kurdish civilians (in the city of Halabja, causing an estimated 5,000 causalities) and against Iranian troops (in the Second Battle of al Faw causing an estimated few thousand causalities)

In June 1994, the Aum Shinrikyo cult/terrorist group released sarin gas in what has become known as the Matsumoto incident (8 dead, 200 injured)

In March 1995, the Aum Shinrikyo group again released an attack with sarin, this time in the enclosed space of Tokyo’s subway system.  (13 dead, 6252 injured)


On 17 May 2004, sarin gas was used in a roadside bomb attack against US troops in Iraq.  (2 injured)


While sarin has been around roughly 80 years, its first confirmed use came only a quarter of a century ago, and although only used rarely since, it does seem that sarin’s primary capability lies in its ability to cause massive casualties, very quickly, and overwhelming most local emergency services.  Make no mistake while sarin has not been extremely fatal in the historical uses, it can be and is highly toxic.  Long-term effects from sarin exposure has not been properly studied.  While sarin does have a short shelf life, and an even shorter exposure life (time on the ground after it has been released), there are derivatives of sarin that are considered to be persistent agents, although none have been found in use in Syria to date.


For more information:  CDC — Facts About Sarin [Link]

Belated Monday Morning Quarterbacking (20 Aug 13)

Monday Morning QBing

Monday Morning QBing


Yes I know this is Tuesday, but better late than never right?

I was over-thinking the whole NSA eavesdropping thing, and I am just wondering why, if the NSA is reading our e-mails, following our blogs, monitoring our web searches, how is it exactly that they missed, the Boston Bombers, Major Nidal Malik Hasan, and the other lesser known Islamic extremist attacks here in America?


Now using my extremely sub-par to fair analytical skills, I came up with a couple of possibilities:


1.  [Conspiracy Theorists this one is for you] They knew ahead of time and let it happen, for the purpose of putting US troops in Palestine and Chechnya.  I find this highly unlikely simply because, well even the Palestinians and the Chechnians (sp?) don’t want those shit holes, so why would we?  BTW there is no credible evidence to oil being in Chechnya.


2.  [Most Dangerous]  The NSA was obeying their idiot politico masters and dipping in on those evil Patriot types (you know those people who think the Constitution is the supreme law of the land, and is NOT a living document), as opposed to the dangerous wack jobs who want to kill innocents to further their backwards-ass, misogynist, hate-filled view of the world posing as a religion.


3.  [Quite Possible, and in my limited Experience Most Likely]  The intelligence analysts at the NSA were completely overwhelmed by the sheer volume of raw data coming in and were unable to sift through the pile of crap [ie all those googles for naked pictures of Mila Kunis] for the kernels of vital intelligence [like the Tsarnaev brothers googling how to build a pressure cooker bomb] in time to disseminate such intelligence to the people who do the killing (and less preferably the arresting).


Obviously I don’t put a whole lot of faith in the first one, and while we all hope and pray it isn’t the second one, we need to overhaul the entire system even if it is the third possibility.

Raw intelligence is of NO VALUE if it is not analyzed and disseminated correctly.


On a side note:

The entire world of intelligence has changed, no longer are intelligence analysts desperately seeking any and every scrap of raw data available to see if it fits into the big picture and where, rather the analyst is confronted with massive volumes of data, a convoluted big picture, and a shortened amount of time to do the analysis.

This is not to say that they should not be held accountable for their failures, merely the should be focused on achieving the achievable rather than attempting to do it all, and failing miserably.


War Over!!!

I don’t know if you heard, but President Obama announced that the ‘War on Terror’ is over…yep you read that correctly…the ‘War on Terror’ is done, complete, finished.

Now before you go celebrating (I totally have a Victory Party on indefinite hold but that is another post) he did not say if we won.  Since the last terrorist attack against us occurred just last week, and there was no unconditional surrender on the part of our enemies…you can understand how I might be a little confused.

First a little history, usually wars came in one of two types, ‘total war’ or ‘limited war’, now a ‘total war’ (think World War II, were we refused all offers of surrender except an unconditional one, and they tend to be brutal, nasty, and long) requires the countries involved to go all out, things like instituting a draft, rationing food and other high-demand consumables, and basically putting the entire country on a ‘war-footing’ to motivate the population behind the war.  Limited wars, are significantly different, they tend to be shorter, if not any less brutal and nasty.  The primary difference occurs during the war, where the war only moderately or insignificantly affects one or more countries (no draft, no rationing etc).

In essence to have a total war, both sides have to be going all out, and will settle for nothing less than an unconditional surrender.  The ‘war on terror’ has never been that.  Like all the wars that the US and the UK have engaged in since World War II, the ‘War on Terror’ has been a limited war, with limited objectives, limited resources expended (massive as those resources are), and of course limited success.

Obviously none of the historical facts have much bearing on the fact, that while we may call an end to the ‘War on Terror’ that does not mean that our enemies will pack up and go home, quite the contrary, ending the ‘war on terror’ without even giving a recent and memorable ‘black eye’ will only embolden them.  We had a couple of opportunities to end the war on better terms, after the initial ousting of Al Qaeda and the Taliban from Afghanistan in 01-02, and the surrender of Saddam Hussein’s forces in 03, the smashing success of the surge, all would have been better times to call a victory and end the war, but no we let those success be fleeting, and snatched defeat from the jaws of victory, allowing the war to drag on and on, for no good purpose, we did not hunt down our enemies like we should have, hounding them to the ends of the earth.

So were does that leave us?  No safer now then we were on…

26 Feb 1993 (1st attack on WTC)

7 Aug 1998 (Embassy bombings in Tanzania and Kenya)

12 Oct 2000 (USS Cole)

11 Sep 2001 (WTC)

12 Oct 2002 (Bali bombings)

7 Jul 2005 (London)

21 Jul 2005 (London)

29 Jun 2007 (London)

30 Jun 2007 (Glasgow)

22 May 2013 (London)


I guess President Obama is busy CYA-ing after illegally harassing his political opponents, journalists, and any one else who bugs him…I guess he is getting advise from Uncle Joe, Stalin, not Biden.


What are your thoughts?

Monday Morning Musings (22 Apr 13)

A couple of thoughts having been banging around my head since Thursday, hence why I haven’t posted my normal Friday Freakout or Sunday Contemplation, I am sure you are contemplating similar things.


1)  What did the FBI know about the 2 Boston Bombers?  Rumors abound about how the Feds knew of the older brother, some are saying a request from the Russian Intelligence Service (FSB) to look into him.  Idk, but there is a whole lot of smoke there.


2)  What did the FSB know?  Do they have more intel on Tamerlan Tsarnaev (the older brother)?


3)  What went on between Monday and Friday?  What did the FBI know and when?  Lots of questions here, that remain unanswered.


4)  Has anyone else heard rumors of injured by-standers, who were shot by police?  How many shots were fired and how many hit?  Word is hundreds of rounds were fired and very few connected to their intended targets.  Perhaps more training would be a good idea for the police.


5)  What was the FBI doing, if they had ID’d the brothers Tsarnaev before Friday?


Lots of questions float over this recent terrorist incident.  If you are wondering a quick intellectual exercise about who benefits, it seems Russia doesn’t (why invite undue American interest in what Russia perceives is sovereign Russian territory, certain Chechens no doubt disagree), Chechen/Dagestani Islamic extremists and or separatists could perceive an attack against the US as advantageous, and one could make a good argument for statists taken advantage of this recent attack for their own purposes, whether they were complicit in the attack is another matter altogether.

Perhaps it is just that this entire incident made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, something seems off, and I can’t put my finger on exactly what it is, and there are many questions lingering in my mind.  This just rings wrong like the entire Benghazi affair.

Perhaps more on this later….


What Are Our Priorities?

What Are Our Priorities?

A simple question, one that should be asked.

Do we really care if Nikki Minaj and Mariah Carey are in a tiff?

Do we really care if Beyonce lip-synced at the inauguration?

and Do we really care if a football player was thinking more with his little head than his big head?

I, would say, NO, yet all these things are major ‘news’ stories…what of the Congressional hearings with Secretary of State Clinton testifying about Benghazi…yea…not so much, well if you missed it, I can assure you, it was an excellent display of theatrics (I do wonder if Hillary should be a contender in the Oscars for best actress, she hit all of the major emotions in the hearings, and unlike certain actresses she didn’t need 23 takes to do it.)  What was discovered….NOTHING.  Not really surprising, the democrats threw her softball questions and the republicans gave speeches (for the most part) when they weren’t praising her service.

While I understand that the whole Benghazi thing was buried by the President and his media buddies, so he could get re-elected, but is that the way we as a country should be?

Looking at it, from the prospective, of one of those people, hoping and praying that the US Military was coming, as the proverbial cavalry, to your rescue, as you are under attack by dozens of enemies, literally for HOURS, (we, of course, now know, no one was coming, only the absolute bravery of some CIA agents disregarding direct orders from…someone…saved the people who were saved), should we allow the people who refused to allow any and all rescue attempts to continue with their public servant career?

Would you like to be in their shoes?

Alone, in the dark, under fire, terrified, unarmed, trying to hide, and now you know how much your life is worth to those public servants in power…Not much.

Do you recall what happened to Ambassador Stevens, after he was captured?  Yea, he was raped and killed, so surrender is not an option, or how about trying to hide out in a burning building?  I am thinking not much fun, either.

How much blood does one need on their hands to be fired?

300 dead Mexicans is not enough for AG Holder to lose his job.  Doesn’t that make the administration racist for caring more for 20 dead American children than 300 dead Mexican children?

We have lost all control of our public servants,

they feel we will not fire them,

that we will not complain,

that we will not do anything.

Are they correct?


What are our priorities?



Thursday’s Thoughts

—Have you heard that when Psy’s Gangnam Style hits 1 billion hits on you tube, it will herald the Apocalypse?


—The Bashad Assad led terrorists have attacked the Free Syrian Army with Scud missile [depending on the version its accuracy is anywhere from 3km to 50m, usually more the former then the latter].  It is a well-known fact that Scud missiles are capable and in the old Soviet doctrine were to be used to carry NBC [Nuclear, Biological, & Chemical] weapons, while The Bashad Assad led terrorists are not known to have any nuclear weapons, they are suspected of having Sarin, Tabun, VX & several varieties of mustard agents, as well as the biological agents botulism, the plague, and cowpox amongst others.  While both types of attacks could take some time to leak out of Syria, the latter could be particularly difficult to confirm, as disease can be rampant in a war-zone, due to lack of hygiene and sanitation.  Can NBC weapons be far behind, as they struggle for the future of Syria is battled over.


—Less than 2 weeks before Christmas, is your shopping done?


—As the year heads to its final days, I am thinking of putting together a post on my pick for person of the year, What do you think?


—The fiscal cliff looms larger than ever, don’t you love playing chicken, well I guess we are in the backseat or trunk.

Turk PM Loses Mind

Still looking for his mind, poor man. (Tayyip Erdogan)

The  Turkish Prime Minister Tayyip Erdogan lost his mind last week, and called Israel a “Terrorist State” for the ongoing Gaza issue.  [ http://www.turkishweekly.net/news/144937/ ].  I wonder what the Turk PM thinks of Hamas run Gaza.  The Picture below is Gazans and their type of justice, what most people refer to as terrorism, below that is some Iraeli soldiers and Palestinian children.

Not Terrorism?

Israeli Terrorism?

It is very sad that the Turkish PM, has forgotten all the things that Mustafa Kemal Atatürk stood for.

Atatürk (Father of Turks)

Can you imagine if a country launched several hundred rockets at Turkey? What would Turkey do?

Sometimes it seems as if the world has been turned upside down. Lies and Propaganda are the norm. The Truth is as rare and precious as gold. Creeping statism is everywhere. Islamic fascism is gaining strength. Freedom is in peril around the world.